Summary: There are definitely some signs you’re headed for divorce–the problem is that they aren’t always easy to see. Sometimes that’s because you’re in denial (it happens to the best of us). But sometimes it’s because the signs are subtle. Now, picking up on these signs isn’t always about avoiding a divorce. More so, it’s about giving you the option to decide how you want to handle things–rather than being swept up in the surprise.
Some Basic Signs You’re Headed for a Divorce
People don’t like to consider divorce as a real possibility. That’s why it’s always a surprise, even though in hindsight you can usually see all of the signs. Spotting the signs you’re headed for a divorce can be beneficial from a financial or personal standpoint, sure. But I think the true benefit is that knowing those signs–seeing a divorce coming–gives you more options and more control.
When you’re blindsided by a divorce, there’s not much you can do about it. Everybody has made up their minds. But when you see that divorce coming, sometimes you can take preventative action; you can go to counseling, you can work on your problems, you can make amends.
Let’s take a look at some of these signs you’re headed for a divorce. If you notice that they apply to you, at least you can open the lines of communication and have a conversation about where you see your marriage headed.
Sign #1: You Argue About Money
Argument is a well established symptom of a relationship tension. It’s not always a bad thing. A productive argument can help clear the air and move a relationship into a better area. However, consistent and constant arguments could be a red flag, especially if those arguments revolve around money.
Now, everybody has a different idea how to spend money (or how to save it). That’s not terribly uncommon. But tension over finances is one the leading causes of divorce. If you find yourself arguing pretty consistently about money, you might want to consider taking some action. Because that might be a sign of an impending divorce.
Sign #2: You’re Spending Less Time Together
Everyone settles into a routine eventually. Which means not every evening is going to be a big night on the town. And you should have your own life outside of your spouse or partner. That’s just healthy. But when you stop spending quality time together on a regular basis, something might be amiss.
Especially if there’s no hope or sign that it’s going to get better in the near future. Spending time together is one of the ways that you build up your relationship–especially when it’s quality time. So if it’s been a while since you’ve had a date night, you might want to consider planning something a little special for this weekend. Just a thought.
Sign #3: You’re No Longer Intimate
A lot of people are going to read this heading and equate it to sex. And that’s true to a certain extent. For some people sex and intimacy are going to be inextricably linked. That’s not going to be the case for everyone, though. Intimacy can present itself in many ways. What’s important is that it’s still present in your relationship.
If intimacy is lacking, this might be something you want to discuss with your spouse. Because this lack of intimacy, this lack of connection, could certainly be a sign that divorce is coming–or a symptom that something is wrong in the relationship. Either way, the sooner you address it, the better off you’ll be.
Divorce Isn’t Always a Bad Thing
To be sure, divorce isn’t always going to be a bad thing. You might see these “signs” listed above as, instead, situations to escape. There’s something to be said for that. Sometimes, divorce will be a way for you to re-establish your identity and move on to something new and better.
But it’s always better to leap into that kind of decision with your eyes open. It can be difficult to make a thoughtful, rational decision about divorce when you’re blindsided by it. So keep an eye out for these signs you’re headed for divorce.